Peru, Colombia, Brazil, Argentina, Chile… what a trip we had over the last 3 weeks. We SMs had grown closer as a family while navigating our way through South America. As the final plane ride began its descent, I saw the familiar views of Rurrenabaque, Bolivia. The milky brown color of the river flowing between the red brick structures of town and the bright greens of the tropical jungle vegetation on the mountains and along the winding road that I so often had taken from town to Familia Feliz. What once had felt so foreign and uncomfortable, now suddenly brought a sense of safety and familiarity. The plane landed and we disembarked, grabbed our bags, and headed into town. As I walked the streets of Rurre, I felt more at home than I had in months. I realized that this remote, quaint, touristy town in the Amazon region of Bolivia had become my second home.

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After a few hours in town, one of the Bolivian volunteers from Familia Feliz came to pick us up to return campus. I felt excitement to see the kids who had stayed for vacation, but I still had a feeling of exhaustion knowing I was going back to rough living conditions, frequent illness, and being on-call 24/7. On the ride back, I sent up a little prayer for strength for the next few months. We finally arrived on campus, and the kids came running to greet us. The many hugs, “we-missed-you’s”, and endless questions from the kids helped wipe away those negative thoughts of exhaustion and stress.

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While we were on holiday break, a new director had arrived. Little did we know, that things were about to drastically change. The next few days after our arrival were spent in 4-5 hour-long meetings about these changes, and I began to feel overwhelmed. However, I knew that even if the way campus was being run was changing, we were still here for the kids and that was the only thing that mattered.

Five weeks have now passed since our return in January. Things have definitely changed, with some of us taking on new responsibilities and everyone carrying a heavier load than before. I have gained care of an almost 3-year-old in addition to my nursing responsibilities which has been challenging to balance. Some have had to take on other responsibilities of teaching, running maintenance, or directing food service. We are all spread thin, and many of us are exhausted, pushing till April when we head home.

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I try not to think about leaving, but sometimes I find myself unwantedly daydreaming about what it will be like. I think those thoughts bring more fear than anything. It feels like I have been living in a world running on frozen time; every day is about the same, the weather is about the same, the people are about the same. I know that when I go back, things will have changed, and time will have moved forward. Ultimately, however, I try not to think these thoughts and live in the moment. I only have a few months left and I want to make the most of it. There is so much left to do and not enough time to do it all.

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